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I am trying, right!?

Friday, 1 May 2020

Trying is such an intersting word. When we cook something new and our kids look at their plate in utter disgust, we ask them to at least "try" it. But what we really mean is that we want them to "eat" it, even if it's just one bite! 


When I was following the Soulkids™ Mentor training in 2010, we had to tell the class what we would change in our lives in response to what we had learnt so far in the course. Because this was not my first training with Vikas I knew I had to be clear in my intentions: "I am going to eat less chocolate. I am going to go to bed on time". You get the idea.


My neighbor, who was new to Soulcentre and to Vikas, came to the following statements: "I am going to try to eat less chocolate. I am going to try to go to bed on time" etc.


O dear, I thought, now she's going to hear it. But Vikas accepted her story, said: "Very good", and went on to the next one. When everyone had had their turn, he invited my neighbor to come to the front of the class, threw a book on the floor and asked her to "try" and pick it up. Ignorant to what he was teaching her, she picked up the book and gave it to him. Vikas looked at her in shock and said: "What are you doing? I asked you to try to pick it up, not to pick it up". And then she finally understood.


How often do we hear people say that they are going to try to loose weight, or that they are going to try to come on time. We all know that that person is most likely not going to loose weight or come on time.


Your mind likes clear instructions.


The words we speak (to others or ourselves) are a command to your mind. You are programming your mind. By using the word "try" in every intention you say, you are building in an escape clause not to do it.


I stopped eating gluten in 2015 on the advice of my doctor. I didn't try to stop eating gluten. I just did it. I gave my mind the order not to eat gluten anymore. And although it took some adjusting, finding alternatives and reading lots of labels, in the end it wasn't all that hard. My mind was focused on "No more Gluten". I don't know if you are familiar with the marketing term "selective perception", but I suddenly saw a lot of gluten free stuff. My mind was helping me to carry out my intention to not eat gluten anymore.


So next time you promise something, watch the words. If you really want it, wouldn't you love to have your mind help you realise it?

- Cate

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